Being left and surviving

At least once in our life, we all have been through this.

Being left by someone we loved, being this a partner, a friend, a relative. We all know how much it hurts, how much it can kill you inside.

Memories, one after the other, go through your mind. Every tiny thought about any random detail is connected to that person and you just can’t help it. You’re gonna try to mend your soul , you’re gonna try to fill up your days. Somedays you won’t be able to move.

You will wake up in the morning feeling empty, like never before. Empty as someone who just lost his everything. And you won’t be able to walk, you won’t wanna talk, you won’t  do what you are supposed to do.

Often people leave us just because they have problems they can’t cope with. They start ignoring you, and you will never understand why the hell the day before they were holding you into their arms telling you they love you so much, and the day after they just avoid you. Sunglasses , chill walking , looking somewhere else, laughing with friends, you pass by them and they act as you were not existing. And how can it be ? No idea. I guess they just feel miserable and not happy with their decision either, that’s why we shouldn’t be angry, we should pity them. They’re sad souls, lost.

But you know what ? I am actually thankful when someone leaves me. Not because I am happy, not at all, don’t get me wrong. I am glad because it makes me stronger. Every day, every minute, I am stronger, wiser, better than I was before. I find the strenght to stand up again, to change what had to be changed, to become the person I really want to be. Maybe I won’t be happy for a bit, maybe I will cry all my tears when nobody is there, maybe I will try to take that person back. But during all this process, I will live, fully.

I will appreciate every single memory of him hugging me, I will live through all the damn times he made me laugh like crazy, and at that point I will enjoy the fact that I still can laugh and love on my own, even if he’s not there anymore.

Being able to live alone is amazing.  Being able to affirm that you don’t need anybody, it’s the best feeling in life. And you can feel it only by experiencing being alone. By enjoying the silence. By enjoying freedom.

When you reach that point, when you are happy no matter what, when you miss the person but it doesn’t matter because your life is beautiful in any case, then everything is  perfect like this.

Laugh and live your life fully.

Other people will enter your life like tornardos if you keep your heart open to love. They’ll probably be better than the previous ones, because you will choose them better. They will know how to make you forget bad days, and if in the end they won’t, it will be ok, you will keep on growing stronger.

And you will feel amazing.

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